THIS AFTERNOON CNN reported that the farewell handshake between Donald Trump and Emmanuel Macron lasted about 25 seconds.

At what point do we accept that this was not a handshake, but rather the pair holding hands as they walked down the Champs Élysées? Because that’s pretty much what it was.

Xinhua News Agency / PA Images Xinhua News Agency / PA Images / PA Images

The whole of Bastille Day was marked by some kind of macho contest between who could make the most direct eye contact and who could bare to shake hands for the longest.

During the French Army Band’s performance of a Daft Punk medley, Trump tried to look like he did not have to capacity to ever enjoy any part of life, lest it look like a weakness in front of his rival handshaker.

He doesn’t even break away to hug the French First Lady, he keeps that handshake going possibly believing that it is undermining Macron. The pair are as bad as each other.

If the video won’t play, you can watch it here.

Of course people have plenty to say.

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Just please let this happen instead next time.

Maybe a buzzer that gives him an electric shock? Or something that produces a fart noise?

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